Accompanying that upbringing was a lack of tools for engaging with frustration and a space where emotions could be expressed when they were small instead of building into big things.

I identify with this so, so much. That bottling of emotions to the point of boiling over, burning red.

I love the Star Trek callback as well, because you are so right: there are so may iterations and variations that some call to mind authority (Picard) and others to expendability (TOS among others).

A little red is fine, because sometimes you have to tap the well, but it's not the color I would want to live in.

This line really struck me as well.

I really, really enjoyed this discussion of various ways red and red emotions have been present in your life. Thank you!