![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Another Month Gone - July 02021
Jul. 28th, 2021 08:56 pmLet's begin with the ways that the government of India is trying very hard to ensure that only approved history can be written, if any history is allowed at all, through the manner in which their National Archives are unorganized, unindexed, and otherwise bureaucratically entangled in red tape such that researchers may never actually get the primary sources they are looking for.
Next, If at any point in 2021 you drew unemployment benefits in the United States, you can use the health insurance exchanges to get good coverage for exceptionally good rates. But you'll have only until the end of July to make the changes, and you have to go through the entire application process to tick the correct box that gets you the good rate.
( A little more materials of interest )
Last for tonight, when talking about things you want an ADHD person to do, articulate the real reason, instead of the one that judges the ADHDer for being themselves. They're already used to being judged for personal failures, and it's no fun. Take one of my neighbors, who has regularly gone straight to the negative about "pride in home ownership" and possibly calling down the city on me about dandelions growing in the front yard (which turned into an unexpected $600 expense when the city said the pile of material in a driveway needed to be cleared out or face a fine), which does nothing but increase shame and start destructive spirals about what other things might be brought to bear to try and force me into taking on his attitude about what is important. My other neighbor, however, offered to use the edger that he has on my lawn as well as his own, so that it produces crisp lines. What that did, however, was give me motivation to keep the grass mowed and the dandelions cut down so that the effort my neighbor was putting in as a favor to me wasn't going to waste. I end up doing what the other neighbor wants, as well, but he's not the reason I'm doing it. (Also, thing to know: you can be the kindest person every other time we interact, but if you gave me grave insult once, I'm always going to treat you with suspicion because you already showed me that you aren't trustworthy. I may or may not ever tell you that you've insulted me, though, because there's very little good that comes of that.)
And how examining historical polyamory or polyamorish kinds of relationships can provide useful information about how those kinds of relationships work for people of our era attempting to do the same. Like the suggestion that polycules forming might have long periods of conflict as they work out their explicit norms for what will eventually be the relationship in question.
Next, If at any point in 2021 you drew unemployment benefits in the United States, you can use the health insurance exchanges to get good coverage for exceptionally good rates. But you'll have only until the end of July to make the changes, and you have to go through the entire application process to tick the correct box that gets you the good rate.
( A little more materials of interest )
Last for tonight, when talking about things you want an ADHD person to do, articulate the real reason, instead of the one that judges the ADHDer for being themselves. They're already used to being judged for personal failures, and it's no fun. Take one of my neighbors, who has regularly gone straight to the negative about "pride in home ownership" and possibly calling down the city on me about dandelions growing in the front yard (which turned into an unexpected $600 expense when the city said the pile of material in a driveway needed to be cleared out or face a fine), which does nothing but increase shame and start destructive spirals about what other things might be brought to bear to try and force me into taking on his attitude about what is important. My other neighbor, however, offered to use the edger that he has on my lawn as well as his own, so that it produces crisp lines. What that did, however, was give me motivation to keep the grass mowed and the dandelions cut down so that the effort my neighbor was putting in as a favor to me wasn't going to waste. I end up doing what the other neighbor wants, as well, but he's not the reason I'm doing it. (Also, thing to know: you can be the kindest person every other time we interact, but if you gave me grave insult once, I'm always going to treat you with suspicion because you already showed me that you aren't trustworthy. I may or may not ever tell you that you've insulted me, though, because there's very little good that comes of that.)
And how examining historical polyamory or polyamorish kinds of relationships can provide useful information about how those kinds of relationships work for people of our era attempting to do the same. Like the suggestion that polycules forming might have long periods of conflict as they work out their explicit norms for what will eventually be the relationship in question.
