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Kiyah! Take that, thesis draft!
Dec. 8th, 2004 11:48 pmI beat out another story's worth of work on it. If I get on a roll (Bwah-hah-hah!) I might manage to hack another story out onto it before Monday next. That would leave me in decent shape - one story to go, and then adding on things like introductions, major conclusions, cross-story themes and the like will put the marks on it. If I get the meat done within the first week or two of the next semester, I'll be in good shape to put a lot of polish time into it. This is a good thing. Polish is editing and rewording, rather than creating entirely new chunks (which will happen, I know, but if I can keep those down to clarifications and explanations, I'm ahead of the game), then I might manage to make this thesis work and get it in properly to graduate on time. That's a comforting thought, when not three months ago, I was very worried I wouldn't be able to find anything at all. Amazing what the brain can do when given latitude and a good support staff. Again, I'm probably going to want some of you types to do segment reviews when they get done, so get your edit skills off the shelf.
Happy birthday to my roommate. Twenty-one, but with an exam tomorrow morning at 9, so his friends couldn't do what they wanted to do to him. Too bad.
Today seemed to be a day of vehicles. While trying to get to the next town over to get my sister for the women's basketball game and back, I was stopped by every red signal that I could have been on the way... I arrived late for my call time, but well before any necessary performance time. Phew.
Speaking of vehicles, is it possible that the modern version of the One Ringis an SUV? It would make diabolical sense, much like the gent ticketed for parking a small car in a big car spot.
But at least we're not all morons. At least, not all of us, all of the time. We hope.
And two different people, well, three, if I count the short form, in some fashion or another, attempted to convince me that what I really need to do is stop worrying so goddamn much about the effects of my causes and start trusting that I'm doing things correctly, for the right reasons, in the right ways. Or at least trust that more than I do right now. The idea of just letting go and not thinking more often is both repugnant and attractive at the same time - to let go would free up a lot of worries, but it's those same worries about effects that make me want to cling and analyze even more. If I'm not going to get some life-shattering experience, then I'll have to do it the hard way - through practice. It's extending the "not caring about other problems" that I can develop while watching sports - in person, that is. Although I get riled up about the game, I can forget about the world outside for a bit. Progress, I suppose, comes in strange places.
I think I billed it as a confidence issue - that I don't trust myself enough to actually let go. This stems a lot from what I talked about earlier - overanalyzing possible effects and comparisons to ideas that are probably far beyond my practical achievement. She suggested meditation - and the stress drop-ins that I went to suggests that this isn't a bad suggestion at all. I think, though, I'd want to combine it with a hypnotic program - something that would de-stress and plant in the brain the means to stay that way. If I can't consciously force the issue, why not subvert it and go straight into the subconscious? Any suggestions?
Idly, I'll note that the two people who responded to my query about being boring are most possibly the two who some random might consider the strangest. Any and all jokes, in-jokes, snickers, and funny things taken from that statement are your own responsibility... and what does that say about me?
Happy birthday to my roommate. Twenty-one, but with an exam tomorrow morning at 9, so his friends couldn't do what they wanted to do to him. Too bad.
Today seemed to be a day of vehicles. While trying to get to the next town over to get my sister for the women's basketball game and back, I was stopped by every red signal that I could have been on the way... I arrived late for my call time, but well before any necessary performance time. Phew.
Speaking of vehicles, is it possible that the modern version of the One Ringis an SUV? It would make diabolical sense, much like the gent ticketed for parking a small car in a big car spot.
But at least we're not all morons. At least, not all of us, all of the time. We hope.
And two different people, well, three, if I count the short form, in some fashion or another, attempted to convince me that what I really need to do is stop worrying so goddamn much about the effects of my causes and start trusting that I'm doing things correctly, for the right reasons, in the right ways. Or at least trust that more than I do right now. The idea of just letting go and not thinking more often is both repugnant and attractive at the same time - to let go would free up a lot of worries, but it's those same worries about effects that make me want to cling and analyze even more. If I'm not going to get some life-shattering experience, then I'll have to do it the hard way - through practice. It's extending the "not caring about other problems" that I can develop while watching sports - in person, that is. Although I get riled up about the game, I can forget about the world outside for a bit. Progress, I suppose, comes in strange places.
I think I billed it as a confidence issue - that I don't trust myself enough to actually let go. This stems a lot from what I talked about earlier - overanalyzing possible effects and comparisons to ideas that are probably far beyond my practical achievement. She suggested meditation - and the stress drop-ins that I went to suggests that this isn't a bad suggestion at all. I think, though, I'd want to combine it with a hypnotic program - something that would de-stress and plant in the brain the means to stay that way. If I can't consciously force the issue, why not subvert it and go straight into the subconscious? Any suggestions?
Idly, I'll note that the two people who responded to my query about being boring are most possibly the two who some random might consider the strangest. Any and all jokes, in-jokes, snickers, and funny things taken from that statement are your own responsibility... and what does that say about me?
