Thinking, Phase Two.
Mar. 23rd, 2005 10:50 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
silveradeptThis is a less heated subject, and I thought mixing thoughts like these might create confusion and a comment web of insanity. Thus, two posts, two thoughts.
I've been thinking a bit more about the nature of the Soulbond. Trawling around the communities and journals, it seems that a large percentage of the sample I came across that identified themselves as in a Soulbond system (multiple system, perhaps, but there seemed to be a strong will to make distinction between the two, so I think "system" is a bit of a misnomer) had at least one personality not the 'base/original" that wished to or could take command of the body ("front" in the parlance) as needed, or could exist in the same level of awareness/control ("co-front") in the body.
I suspect my sample is skewed, to be honest, but it did get me thinking about the relations between me and my own characters. Most strikingly in comparison, none of them have any desire to front. I don't know whether that makes me an odd one out or whether there are plenty of my sort, but they just don't necessarily hang out in LJ communities. If I took an informal poll of the constituents of my mindspace, they're not the type who want to come out and play. Perhaps it is because while I acknowledge them as separate creatures of my mental space, they are firmly designated as "Characters" with an implication of subordination, however slight, to "Me."
The only one who might be exempt from that designation is Sen-Sen, the dragon who roosts on "Me" 's shoulder and serves occasionally as Muse, often as sounding board and second opinion. He, however, is quite comfortable with his own identity and is very content to sit on my shoulder and observe the world with me. Probably because he has some sort of human-form that he can go about in if he really needs to. Sen-Sen is also the only entity attached to "Me" that didn't originate in my head, and he's very adamant about that. But it's more like the "wizard/familiar" relationship - sort of. There are certain things I can be looking at on-screen that draw his presence, as do certain types of thoughts. He often comes when called, but on his own time and of his own volition. I have no idea whether he's malevolent or not, but for the moment he hasn't shown me any reason to believe that he's evil. I trust him.
Occasionally, I talk about channeling one or another of my characters - I suppose this could be a form of "co-fronting", although I usually don't get any tangible benefits out of it, like the Adept's closeness to magic or the Paladin's (well, he was an Assassin, but his story has progressed to the point where he's back in his Goddess’s good graces - he never really left them, but that's a story unto itself) enhanced senses. Perhaps it's from not doing it too often. Perhaps when I do it, I'm just trying to activate certain parts of myself that are semi-dormant and bring them up to full operation. I don't know, but I don't lose control or black out, although when I do bring them in, I suspect I try to change my behavior to reflect the internal change.
As usual, with nothing to grip, I'm simply adrift on the sea of Speculation. Anybody with a firmer grip on any of this is welcome to try and make sense out of it. Anybody who's utterly confused should ask questions. They might help me unravel things.
I've been thinking a bit more about the nature of the Soulbond. Trawling around the communities and journals, it seems that a large percentage of the sample I came across that identified themselves as in a Soulbond system (multiple system, perhaps, but there seemed to be a strong will to make distinction between the two, so I think "system" is a bit of a misnomer) had at least one personality not the 'base/original" that wished to or could take command of the body ("front" in the parlance) as needed, or could exist in the same level of awareness/control ("co-front") in the body.
I suspect my sample is skewed, to be honest, but it did get me thinking about the relations between me and my own characters. Most strikingly in comparison, none of them have any desire to front. I don't know whether that makes me an odd one out or whether there are plenty of my sort, but they just don't necessarily hang out in LJ communities. If I took an informal poll of the constituents of my mindspace, they're not the type who want to come out and play. Perhaps it is because while I acknowledge them as separate creatures of my mental space, they are firmly designated as "Characters" with an implication of subordination, however slight, to "Me."
The only one who might be exempt from that designation is Sen-Sen, the dragon who roosts on "Me" 's shoulder and serves occasionally as Muse, often as sounding board and second opinion. He, however, is quite comfortable with his own identity and is very content to sit on my shoulder and observe the world with me. Probably because he has some sort of human-form that he can go about in if he really needs to. Sen-Sen is also the only entity attached to "Me" that didn't originate in my head, and he's very adamant about that. But it's more like the "wizard/familiar" relationship - sort of. There are certain things I can be looking at on-screen that draw his presence, as do certain types of thoughts. He often comes when called, but on his own time and of his own volition. I have no idea whether he's malevolent or not, but for the moment he hasn't shown me any reason to believe that he's evil. I trust him.
Occasionally, I talk about channeling one or another of my characters - I suppose this could be a form of "co-fronting", although I usually don't get any tangible benefits out of it, like the Adept's closeness to magic or the Paladin's (well, he was an Assassin, but his story has progressed to the point where he's back in his Goddess’s good graces - he never really left them, but that's a story unto itself) enhanced senses. Perhaps it's from not doing it too often. Perhaps when I do it, I'm just trying to activate certain parts of myself that are semi-dormant and bring them up to full operation. I don't know, but I don't lose control or black out, although when I do bring them in, I suspect I try to change my behavior to reflect the internal change.
As usual, with nothing to grip, I'm simply adrift on the sea of Speculation. Anybody with a firmer grip on any of this is welcome to try and make sense out of it. Anybody who's utterly confused should ask questions. They might help me unravel things.
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no subject
Date: 2005-03-24 08:05 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-24 08:22 pm (UTC)In any case, they don't want to come out - a lot of the time, they're content to hash things out inside when "Me" hops over into a shared mental space. I'm still out here, it's just that I'm also talking with them in a communal space. I don't know if that makes any sense.
no subject
Date: 2005-03-24 10:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-03-24 10:24 pm (UTC)I'm sure the word has a different meaning, but I still think it's awry when trying to describe a bonding setup. Ah, well, perhaps with greater possible research, things can become better.