Shredding the Clique

[silveradept]

I promised ldragoon in March that I would read and review The Clique, by Lisi Harrison, along with several of the Unabashed Feminism department. Well, my copy arrived from the library, finally. So let's get to it.

I haven't even opened the book yet and I'm already feeling like this will be painful. Here's the bio lines.

Massie Block:...Massie knows you'd give anything to be just like her.
Dylan Marvi: Massie's second-in command who divides her time between sucking up to Massie and sucking down Atkins (1) Diet Shakes. (Actually, it turns out to be Zone diet)
Alicia Rivera: As sneaky as she is beautiful...floats easily under adult radar because she seems so "sweet". Would love to make Massie's throne one day. Just might.
Kristen Gregory: She's smart, hardworking, and will insult you to tears faster than you can say "my haircut isn't ugly!"

Gee, tell me again why someone would want in on that crowd? But here comes our protagonist, Claire Lyons, with her Keds (2) and Gap (3) overalls, and Prada (4) knockoff future. Apparently, with luck and scheming, she might come up smelling like Chanel No. 19 (5). Yep. Five brand names on the back cover alone. So, with trepidation, I actually open the book and start reading...

References by brand name, celebrity name, gratuitous usage of names, and such in book (counting every time it's mentioned Claire's sneakers are Keds, for example): 191
Total pages of book: 220

So, if you're not put off by the constant stream of pop culture, fashion, and other references being made, then there's a chance. Spoilers ahead.

Choice quotes:

"What's so hard about buying a house?" Massie asked. "Are they poor?" She said "poor" the same way her mother said "fat".

"Brownie [her horse], did I tell you I'll be entering the seventh grade as a bra wearer?"

[Claire, thinking about a gift got for Massie] How can a top thinner than toilet paper be that expensive... seven hundred and eighty dollars.

Narcissism and me-centeredness, check. Frivolous expensive expenditures for the sole purpose of showing how much Claire doesn't fit in, check. These twin themes continue on through the whole book.

She'd [Claire] thought reading the OCD School handbook would help her relax and feel more comfortable about her first day of school, but it had the opposite effect.

School does that. Of course, an OCD school would do that even more, and repeatedly.

The school itself is abuzz with gossip and Claire, "poor" girl that she is, is subjected to the whims of a school with more money than it knows what to do with, and inhabitants that are the same. Massie sics her pack on Claire after Claire rightly calls her out for what she is. After a visit with the nurse because she's gets red paint and everyone thinks she's menstruating (ha, ha, what a funny joke), Claire continues to pine after Massie's table. I'm guessing there's a trainwreck ahead. [pages pass...]

Yep. She's found her good group of friends, but she wants to be part of Massie's table. Massie's mom, bless her heart, is trying to get the two girls to like each other and get along, but Massie's got her head so far up her ass and surrounding herself with sycophants that it'll take some doing for anything to change. In pursuit of a high school boy, Massie selfishly deludes his sister into thinking they're friends. Doesn't last for too many pages, though. Claire manages some fun with the Clique while Massie's away, but the Clique slips back into role when she returns. As if our readers needed blatant confirmation that removing Massie from the equation would mean that Claire would get along with everyone.

Then Claire, finding an opportunity, starts impersonating Massie on IM to make the puppets dance and to make Massie feel out in the cold. Because the formula hasn't failed us yet, the plan falls apart, although Massie does get a good taste of what being frozen out is like. We get a "happy ending" through the magic of parents, where Claire gets to exact petty revenge on one of the Clique, and spends some time with Massie hanging out because their fathers are embarrassing them both. At the end of the book, we're supposed to believe that Massie has at least warmed to the idea that Claire might not be so bad after all. To check the truth of that, we'd have to read book two, but to me, we've ended the book where we've started it, but now Claire's just a Z-list person at the school, rather than the "new kid". The Clique will continue to be mean to Claire, she will continue to want to be in it, against all sense and reason, and hijinks will ensue.

That's the book. With as many brands and names being slung about, it's almost tough to find the plot. There were a couple times reading it where I glossed on something, missing the brand name until I went back and read it again. I think we're supposed to identify and sympathize with Claire, because she's the normal kid stuck somewhere she doesn't fit into, but Claire's behavior is certainly no exemplar of virtue. She's trying to hard to be like one of the Clique to really be sympathetic to empathetic toward. My biggest complaint about all of this is that nobody in this book appears to exercise any sort of wisdom anywhere near the characters. The nurse's "generosity" in letting Claire pick out rich kid clothes is a backhanded compliment. The nurse has figured out what's going on, basically, and understands that Claire is a wannabe, but decides to fuel the fantasy rather than giving her two hits with a cluebat. The parents seem blissfully unaware that their daughters are spending obscene amounts of money on their clothes and accessories (five credit cards before high school? I wouldn't trust a child that young with one), and that the girls are mean to just about everyone else in their school. With the way emotions boil over in those years, it's a wonder that the Clique didn't find itself on the wrong end of a dust-up at least once in their school careers before this book starts. The novel's cheery assumption that everyone really does harbor secret desires to be an A-list school celebrity is strange - even the plucky, independent, sort-of-perspective-providing girl drops friendships to go hang out with Massie. The worse assumption than that, though, is that the A-list is where it's at. Not once did I see a negative consequence imposed for any of the actions of the Clique. Claire, however, appears to have actual parents, after she gets tethered when she doesn't call home, and who has to pay for the clothes see used Alicia's card to buy. The Clique can be mean and petty, spend money like they have an endless well to draw from, and basically act like the queens of the roost, and they magically manage not to have their prestige cut out from under them, suffer a successful strike against them, or get hammered down by a teacher for their actions.

Suffice it to say, I do not think I will be reading any more books in this series. The first one is sufficient to ward me away. Although I do admit to a small amount of curiosity as to whether Claire and Massie end up liking each other or merely agreeing that they're under a permanent truce. Not enough to read the other books in the series.

Comments

[woodburner.livejournal.com]

I've seen those books on the shelves and felt faintly revolted just looking at the covers. Your review does not make me feel any warmer. XD;

[silveradept]

It's certainly not the best piece of literature I've read in my life. And I think all of the reviewers went in knowing that it was going to be pretty bad.