Question for the Commentariat.

[silveradept]

Please answer the following two-parter, if you feel comfortable doing so.

(a) Have you successfully resolved the existential crisis of not only mortal life, but the likelihood that you and what you do will be essentially meaningless in the history of the cosmos?

(b) If so, please let me know your solution and its reasons. If not, please let me know where your difficulties are.

I'm still wrestling this one, and I have yet to find an acceptable answer in either religion or philosophy. A TARDIS and/or the ability to see what the post-life experience is like, remember it, return to life, and then evaluate by that standard is about as far as I've gotten for acceptable outcomes. I'm sure there has to be at least one that will click and fill the void of being able to conceptualize oneself in cosmic terms.

Comments

[catnamedrabbit.livejournal.com]

1) Yeah. I am but a tiny miniscule blip in the vast history of the cosmos. I am essentially a nothing. I am actually reminded of a (paraphrased) quote from the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy is that because the amount of life in the universe is so small when compared to the vastness of the universe, life was essentially zero.

2) However I have come to the conclusion that the vastness of the universe compared to myself doesn't matter. It's the other people whom I share this life with. Consider this, it is only through the eyes and mouths of a human being are we remembered. The human experience can only be experienced by a human. The trees won't remember us when we are gone. The dogs and cats and birds and fish and other fauna won't remember us when we are gone. It is only the people whom we touch that will remember us.

Ask yourself, how will people remember you at your funeral? What would they say about you? Would they recount the joyful, exuberant, playful things you have done? would they expouse your kindness? Would they tell their children stories about you?

I am also reminded and comforted about my existence from a scene in from watchmen ( comic or movie doesn't matter). It's when Laurie and Jon are on mars, just after Laurie realizes who her father was... Jon says something to the effect of " I've longed to see an oxygen molecule turn to gold, but you were distilled in such a perfect form from all that chaos... that is a miracle."

Apologies for butchering the quote, and not providing more context ( seriously go read the comic if you havent!)... but that moment sits with me and shows me that while my life in the context of the vastness of the cosmic history of everything doesn't matter.. it's that i am here anyway. I exist, i think and feel and even if it is all a lie and were are but mere puppets or holograms or just various bits of mass put together... my experience is still my own to cherish, to enjoy and to hold dear.

I experience something the vast cosmos has no idea about.

I feel.

[silveradept]

I have, on occasion, considered asking, on my anniversary of birth, for people to write what they would speak at my funeral, so that I may have the wisdom of their words while I am still alive to appreciate them. I would hope they spoke well of me.

I have read Watchmen, and I recognize the right area where the quote and style comes from.

The path you propose can be difficult, when one feels that there isn't much worthwhile in the life right now, often because there's no feedback that proves it is. With a poor self-image, it can be hard to convince yourself that your existence is sufficient.

[catnamedrabbit.livejournal.com]

Honestly, I'm speaking from my experience which includes knowing what it is like to feel completely worthless, and both consciously and unconsciously getting fed up with the meaninglessness of my life.

.. no i can't teach anybody this life altering point, it's just something they have to experience themselves in their lives in order for the path i have proposed to pose as anything more then an obstacle.

But I will tell you anyway and to all those who listen. Clairity comes the moment you realize that you cannot rely on external feedback to find your meaning. The human experience is a personal thing. It is only through your eyes and your feelings can you create anything with meaning within the context of yourself. The outside, the cosmos isn't going to tell you that...

... it's a little bit of personal responsibility to create your own context. This is where I fit, I say.

And it may very well be that the path i take to find out my place in the cosmos, if i have one, is entirely and completely unique to myself.

But I don't think I was ever one to let difficulty be an obstacle. God. Meet unmovable rock. ^_^